Brilliant Plan

So, Grandma forwarded me an email today titled "How to Install an Affordable Home Security System"

I personally think it is brilliant.

When I buy my land and put a cabin on it (goal is by the time I'm 35) I will need some type of security system while I'm gone. I am thinking of employing something along these lines.
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Subject: How to install an affordable home security system
1. Go to the Goodwill Store and buy a pair of men'swork boots, size 14-16 (well used).
2. Place them on the front porch along with a copy of Gunand Ammo magazine.
3. Put a couple of BIG dog dishes next to the boots andmagazine.
4. Leave a handwritten note on your door that reads:
Hey Bubba!
Big Jim, Duke, Slim and Me went for more ammo....be back in about 1 hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls--they got after the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all the dogs in the house. Just wait outside til we get back.
Cooter

I will change a few things. For example, I don't think it is good practice for me to start signing ANYTHING "Cooter."